Devout 

Doctor A  : ” I am a devout atheist. Your arguments won’t work on me ”

Doctor Cranky:” and you re devoted tooooo …………….?”

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Fell off a horse.

Patient : I fell off my horse . Went to er . They did all kind of xrays ,told me nothing is broken and sent me home. But why am I hurting soo bad.

Dr Cranky: well, I think you fell off a horse.

Er

Dr Cranky: I don’t think this patient needs admission to the hospital . 

ER Doc: I have done catscan of head , chest, abdomen along with ultrasound of gall bladder , X-rays of all his limbs and MRI of his ears. Plus I have checked all the electrolytes, liver enzymes , blood counts and I have even done a lumbar tap and semen analysis .What I have  found is that he has a viral infection . 

Dr Cranky : yeah it’s called a cold .

First class

Patient : I have back problems and I have to go to California for my disability hearing . My ex employer is paying for my travel . Since my back hurts I cannot travel by car that long a distance .  Can you write me a letter saying I need to travel by air since it will be shorter and my back won’t hurt as bad .

Dr ( after A lot of deliberation ): ok here is your letter . I understand it will be difficult for you to travel more then a thousand miles in  a car , so yes you should go by air . That’s what I would have done if I had to go to California 

Patient: can you write me a letter saying I have to travel in first class.